I don't really know how to sum up the last week or so other than to post some pictures. I got to spend some time up in the Tetons with my fam, well at least those of us who aren't in med school, on a mission, or stuck at work (like John) and for the most part it was heavenly. We did a lot of hiking, boating, relaxing, and even though I was dying to water ski on the glassy water just being on Jackson Lake was enough.

They just opened up this new wildlife preserve with the most beautiful hike to Phelps Lake. The land has been privately owned by the Rockefeller's for years and we've always wanted to sneak in and see the lake up close, but fortunately they decided to donate the land to the park service.

This was probably one of the most beautiful hikes I've ever done!

I couldn't help but think this would make the perfect engagement shot, too bad I found it 5 years too late!

Look at that picture perfect scenery!

At the top of the gondola at Teton Village where we stayed

The water was so high at the lake that we could practically boat up the river coming down from Mt. Moran

Look at Megan fly (once again I was jealous, but baby's worth putting the extreme sports on hold)

My mom is so awesome, I mean how many 50+ year old women would decide to stand up on a rubber tube at 20 mph!

For those of you who read the post I wrote a couple weeks back on Jackson Lake, externally this trip was a lot like the first half of the day--picture perfect, serene, and blissful. However, internally things have been really hard. Maybe it was being away from my emotional support and lifeline (aka John) for 5 days. Even though Jackson was heavenly, for some reason the chaos I came home to seems to be a better fit for how I'm feeling inside. My amazingly talented (and maybe slightly crazy) husband is in the process of remodeling our house before the baby comes and we currently have most of our stuff crammed into the living room. I know the finished product will be worth it, but right now it feels like everything in my life is caught up in a whirlwind of change. Sometimes I long for the familiarity, safety, and security of how things "used" to be, whatever that means. Control and routine have been my way of life, and yet here I am now where nothing is routine and most things are out of my control. I can't go back to my old ways of dealing with stress, chaos, and uncertainty, but I'm struggling to find new, "healthy" ways of coping. Right now I feel like I'm just trying to make it through the day, reminding myself to breathe and praying that eventually the anxiety will subside.